The Ridiculous Art of Scheduling Relaxtion

Beause, Apparently, I Need a Calendar Reminder to Chill

This email is brought to you by the Gentle Creative.

Cali Bird

has created “a place where I write about the lessons learnt as I discover a chronic sense of self-love and a side-order of resilience.” A place where she "give[s] people permission to be kind to themselves.”

I have her index bookmarked on my never ending tbr list. She has pieces on time management, mindset, crafting and publishing, tough love. I want to read them all! In fact, sitting down to read Cali is exactly what I am going to do once this email is sent. I am currently on a break from work and am enjoying some R&R as I’m writing this. I don’t know what time it is. Glorious.

Writers and readers alike can find something on Cali’s substack. Life’s busy. There’s too much demanding our attention. Rest is so important.

Photo by Clay Banks

I’ve mentioned before that I see myself as a recovering perfectionist. I aimed for straight A’s in school, worked several jobs throughout college. I squeeze in a part time writing job in the early mornings (like today, I beat the neighborhood rooster up). It’s typical that I aim high.

But, as some of you can probably guess, these ambitious goals aren’t sustainable. One practice that I have been working on for the last couple of years is a practice of rest. I added rest to my schedule, studied the different kinds of rest (there are seven).

Picture source

I’ve attempted so many strategies. I’ve tried taking a week off from writing. I changed my writing “weekends” to different days, like Monday or Thursday, so I could devote a weekend day on writing without burning myself out by skipping rest time. I experimented with taking an entire month off. It’s hard to let go!

After completing the full draft of my most recent work in progress in December, I saw an opportunity to practice rest. I left with my family to Florida for New Years and didn’t pack my laptop. I gave myself zero expectation to write on this vacation, but instead brought three books and a magazine. This was to be my whole month. No word count goals. No hard deadlines. Just read and follow my creativity where it takes me (sounds woo hoo, I know). In the past, I struggled to take a full break, to let go of my goals and stop working for a set time. This is something I want to improve on. It’s necessary if I have any hope to sustain all the activities I love to do and pay the bills (they insist on getting paid every month, what’s up with that??)

So I thought about the different kinds of rest. This wasn’t a month of just sleeping more. It’s not physically exhausted. It’s the sensory, creative, and mental rest that I feel the biggest need for. It’s finding time to get my body moving, to read the book that has been sitting on my shelf for ages that I get to, to shutting off all sensory input.

So I took January off. I read. I worked toward a regular exercise routine. I crocheted toy vegetables for my daughter’s fridge, watched movies, did whatever I wanted to do. And, about two weeks into the new year, all I wanted to do was write 😅.

I get antsy when I’m not creating for a time. I’m cranky and lack motivation to do anything. It has helped to stay busy. Work had me busy over a couple weekends this month, which helped a bit more. I also wrote. The point of the break is to enjoy myself, to rest and have fun. No projects in mind, just getting words on paper.

And so I’ve finished my month of rest. I’ll do it again in the spring time. It was a good month and a good practice in slowing down. I was forced to reflect on the expectations I put on myself and revisit my writing goals over the next quarter. Everytime I do this, I trim away some goals, a disappointment, but I’m saving myself stress later. This time will help when I jump into my next project (word count expectations and everything!)

Do you struggle getting rest in? Or is that just my own neurotic problem? Haha